Back in the day, cop shows used to market themselves to kids with plastic “detective sets” complete with a gun, handcuffs and a shiny badge. One such show to do this was Starsky and Hutch. Now, S.W.A.T.  was another show to market itself in a similar way, but they took it up a notch or two (that’s for another Storytime).  At any rate, I loved Starsky and Hutch and often saw a kindred spirit in the high strung Detective David Michael Starsky. In this set there was a gun similar to the .45 my favorite of the duo carried, handcuffs, a badge AND a copy of the Miranda Rights that every good cop quoted to every criminal that they brought to justice. I read that thing until I had it committed to memory flawlessly! 

In one episode I seem to remember that Hutch, Starsky’s partner, had been drugged or something… all I remember is someone grabbing his arm and shouting “YOU’RE A JUNKIE!” Now, I didn’t know exactly what a junkie was, but I knew that it wasn’t good. So, one day, I was on patrol around my house and noticed that my twin sister was in her room, minding her own business, but something in me would not just leave her be. I had my gun in a makeshift shoulder holster, just like Dave Starsky, my badge and cuffs… it was time for a raid!

I run into my sister’s room, grab her arm and point at it while shouting “YOU’RE A JUNKIE!” She fell off of her bed and onto the floor. I felt like the suspect was trying to get away, so I pulled my gun on her and shouted the Miranda at her before I cuffed her. At this point she’s in tears, but I don’t care because justice was about to be served. But then the Captain (my Mom) walks in to see what all the commotion was about and I was suspended (sent to my room for quiet time). Needless to say, I never got the collar, but then I transferred to S.W.A.T.!